Spring 2007

 This Crush

I'm kind of nervous about telling you this
But I guess I should just
Come right out and say it.

You see, I totally have a
Crush on you.

And I know it sounds silly
'Cause we're both adults now but
This crush
Makes me feel like I'm fourteen
All over again.

This crush
Makes me long for
Faux-origami folded notes
Slipped into my locker
Or passed behind teacher's back

This crush
Makes me want to
Wear my hair in pigtails
That will tempt you to pull them
Whenever I'm not paying attention.

Yeah, this crush
Makes me want to be your girlfriend
Just 'cause I think you're
The cutest boy in school.

With you,
I don't want to have to worry about
Compatibility or common interests
I don't want to date you;
I want for us to be "going out"
Even if that means we never actually
Go anywhere at all.

Now, I wasn't sure how to tell you all this because

This crush
Made me want to tell my friend,
Who'd tell her friend, who'd tell her friend,
Who'd tell another friend who'd, finally,
Tell you that

I don't just like you
I like like you.

And maybe, you'd hear that
And maybe, you'd think that
Maybe, you might like like me too.

Maybe you'd decide
You'd want to be my boyfriend
(Meaning we'd hold hands whenever
We thought that no one else was watching...)

But, I decided to go this way instead
Because no matter how young and giddy
This crush
Makes me feel
I haven't forgotten that we're
Too old now for games of "Telephone"
So this is the only way I could think of
To tell you that

This crush
That I have on you
Makes me want to build a treehouse
Just for us.

We could waste lazy afternoons
Up there together
And forget every mean thing
That's ever been said to us
Forget every time our hearts
Have been broken.

This crush
Could make everything feel brand new.
When we finally kiss for the first time,
We'd be fresh & unspoiled
Fumbling our way through
The tender exhilaration of becoming
High school sweethearts
Years too late.

I know that nothing is likely
To ever be that simple again,
And that you probably think I'm foolish
For trying to hold on to
The idealism of young love, but

This crush,
Has made me talk too much.

I've said everything I can and now
All I can do is wait
For your response to this
Rather adolescent declaration.

Wait for you to decide
If you can believe that
This crush
Can take us to that treehouse,
Remind us what it was like to be
Carefree.

Wait for you to tell me that
you see more in me than
Just a silly girl
And that you want to hold my hand and
It doesn't matter
Who can see us.